Mr. Smooth has a way with women. He’s not blessed with movie star looks or a Fortune 500 bank account, but he can approach any woman any time, anywhere and with great success. He is the envy of every male who knows him.

Most of us know a Mr. Smooth and marvel at how he does it. “What the heck does he say to them?”, we constantly ask ourselves.

Here’s a little secret. Oftentimes, it’s not what he does or says to women that matters but what he doesn’t do or say. The following are some of the myths or the biggest flaws in our thinking when it comes to approaching women:

1. “She’s out of my league”

When men see a very attractive woman, they think, “She’s way too beautiful to be interested in a sorry slob like me.”

Thoughts like that are the kiss of death. Women love confidence and can smell a man’s lack of it like a shark smelling blood. Train yourself to stop thinking this way and you will be amazed at your success. Besides, beautiful women intimidate most men and are therefore approached the least. They will be receptive to a regular conversation with a confident guy.

2. “She won’t welcome my approach”

Men rationalize an inability to approach a woman this way: “I’m a nice guy and I don’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. She may think I’m a pervert so I won’t approach her at all.”

If you think that way, you’re not being a nice guy. You’re being a scared guy. Don’t kid yourself.

It’s time to act like a man and go after what you want.

3. “She will get in my face and embarrass me”

It’s one of our favorite horror stories – approaching a woman, getting rejected and having all her friends laugh loudly at you.

Do you want to know what most women will tell a guy if they’re not interested? “Sorry, I have a boyfriend.” And that’s it. There’s no rude rejection or insulting laughter.

Hey, the boyfriend thing may even be true. That’s not so bad, is it? Of course, there are a few rude women, but they are quickly forgotten once you come across a woman who is not rude.

4. “I will shower her with flattery so she thinks I’m great”

Compliments are good and flattery works. But if you unload a truckload of compliments on a woman you have just met, she’ll think you’re needy or full of crap. You can kiss any hope of romance goodbye.

Better to pay her one compliment and an honest one at that. Think hard at what that compliment will be because it may take you all the way home.

5. “I shouldn’t cross the Nice Guy Line.”

Sometimes you get into a stimulating conversation with an attractive woman. You fantasize about being her lover but are afraid of saying something that a nice guy shouldn’t say. You avoid crossing the Nice Guy Line at all costs. What happens is that you turn into friends, rather than lovers, and stay
that way.

There are three things a man can tell a woman to demonstrate that he wants her. He can comment on her attractiveness, say something with sexual undertones or suggest a date. Unfortunately, most men avoid these comments for fear of crossing the Nice Guy Line. If this is your problem, ask yourself whether you want to be her friend or her lover. Then talk to her accordingly.

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Today’s tech savvy couples are plugging in and creating unique wedding invitations on CD/DVD. These customized invitations use music and images, photo montage and video, to tell the couple’s story and provide a personal invite to their wedding. Each CD/DVD comes complete with artwork, case and mailer and provides everything found in the standard invitation such as RSVP and map/directions.

Tech-challenged older family members have been known to get frustrated with this unique wedding invitation so think about delivering a basic printed version along with the CD/DVD.

A favorite 5×7 digital photo of the couple framed in a festive border with the event details and your own wording printed inside creates a unique wedding invitation for the budget minded. For a special touch you can glue a ribbon or dried flower along the border that frames the photo.

Photographs also deliver a treasured memory keepsake when creatively designed with rich paper and accents. Wedding guests often frame these unique wedding invitations.

A portrait of the couple, recreated from a photograph, brings even more elegance to the wedding invitation. A professional artist creates an original artwork to be cherished by the bride and groom for a lifetime.

Extraordinary wedding invitations using handmade paper, pressed flowers, and handmade silk ornaments are boxed with rose petals and confetti to present the mood of a wedding destined to delight the senses. Wedding invitations uniquely scrolled with cinnamon sticks attached to both ends and tied with a silk ribbon are delivered in a paper wrapped tube for the curious to discover the wedding information inside.

Unique wedding invitations have the potential of being as unique as the couple designing the concept and invitation.

i-weddinginvitations.com Wedding Invitations Info provides information on cheap, unique, and do-it-yourself wedding invitations, plus wedding shower invitations, and advice on wedding invitation wording. Wedding Invitations Info is the sister site of i-Weddingfavors.com Wedding Favors Web.

I’ll be straight, I did the deed in Las Vegas. But, quite frankly, I don’t consider myself of the shameful and despicable sort. And, I’m definitely not alone. Each year, more than 150,000 couples from all over the world travel to Las Vegas to tie the knot. Eloping to this gambling town has actually become one of the most trendy things to do and for lots of good reasons.

A Las Vegas Wedding is Hassle Free

The State of Nevada’s laid-back marriage laws make it one of the easiest places in the world to obtain a marriage license and to get married. There are no blood tests required and no waiting period. Just a quick trip to the courthouse, show some identification (driver’s license or passport), lay out $55 in cash and you’re on your way.

What’s more, planning your wedding couldn’t be easier. Full-service Las Vegas wedding chapels and hotels with wedding chapels typically have a wedding coordinator ready to personally attend to your wedding arrangements right down to the last detail. Your wedding flowers, music, photography, video or any preparation of your ceremony can all be handled by phone or even online.

A Las Vegas Wedding is Cheaper

No doubt about it, a Las Vegas wedding will save you money. There are services to match just about any budget. You can have a “just do the job” wedding ceremony for as little as $100. Not a bad deal. A traditional Las Vegas wedding package for around $200 will include chapel fee, a video of the ceremony, basic flower and photo arrangements and chapel time.

On the other hand, if you want a more stylish wedding with all the bells and whistles, you can expect to pay up to a few thousand dollars depending on the package you choose. Nonetheless, compared to a do-it-yourself traditional wedding, which averages around $22,000, you’ve saved yourself a bundle.

A Las Vegas Wedding Allows You Plenty of Flexibility

You don’t have to lock in the church, minister or reception hall a year in advance. In Las Vegas, you can book a chapel in very short notice. In fact, in some places, you can walk in without a reservation, depending on how busy they are. I wouldn’t advise this, however. Better to have a reservation and not take a gamble.

Been There, Done That

Las Vegas weddings are extremely popular with couples who have been married before. If you’ve already been there, done that with a big wedding, you may take great pleasure in a relaxing getaway for a comfortable, stress-free wedding.

Las Vegas Weddings Are Unique

If you choose to exchange vows in Las Vegas, you are not limited to a quickie, unfashionable affair. A Las Vegas wedding can be as stylish or as intimate as you like. If you are in the “been there, done that” category, you may want a very simple, get-to-the- nitty-gritty service. On the other hand, you may prefer something a little more romantic and traditional. It’s your choice. Elvis wedding ceremonies are very popular in Las Vegas, as well as outdoor ceremonies and helicopter weddings above the Strip or to the Grand Canyon.

Honeymoon Express

Your honeymoon begins immediately after the “I do’s.” What could be a more unique place for a honeymoon than Las Vegas? And if you brought along a wedding party, you won’t have to worry about keeping them entertained. They’ll find all kinds of fun and never be bored.

So, is getting married in Las Vegas tacky? If you’re looking for a hassle-free, cheaper wedding with plenty of flexibility, a Las Vegas wedding could be…well, a pretty good gamble.

For more encouraging writings to help make your life just a little bit easier visit myselfawareness.com My Self-Awareness.

Beth and Tom were happily married for over 25 years – no small feat in today’s world. At first, their friends could not understand how their marriage succeeded, due to numerous perceived shortcomings.

However, closer scrutiny of their marriage revealed that it was their thinking patterns – the ways they explained and interpreted their partner’s behavior to themselves – that strengthened, rather than weakened, their marriage.

Tom’s lack of self-confidence? No problem! This only made Beth feel very caring toward him. His stubbornness and obstinacy? Again Beth explained this to herself as “I respect him for his strong beliefs and it helps me have confidence in our relationship.”

Beth’s jealousy? Tom told himself: “This is a marker of how important my presence is in her life.” Beth’s shyness? No problem! Tom liked it because “she does not force me into revealing things about myself that I don’t want to… this attracts me to her even more.”

Marriage and health

Numerous studies have shown that the health of your marriage plays a major role in determining your overall physical health. Healthy marriage – healthy body!

Hold on to your illusions

Being able to see things in your mate that your friends don’t is a very positive predictor of marital success according to recent research by a professor at the State University of New York. Remarkably, satisfied couples see virtues in their partners that are not seen by their closest friends.

In contrast to this ‘illusion’ by happy couples, dissatisfied couples have a ‘tainted image’ of each other; they see fewer virtues in their mates than their friends do.

The happiest couples look on the bright side of the relationship (optimism). They focus on strengths rather than weaknesses and believe that bad events that might threaten other couples do not affect them.

But what if you are an optimist and your partner is a pessimist? That can work! Or, the other way around? That can work too!

However, two pessimists married to each other place their marriage in jeopardy because when an untoward event occurs, a downward spiral may follow.

Pessimistic scenario

Unlike Optimists, pessimistic partners make permanent and pervasive explanations to themselves when bad events occur. (Conversely, they make temporary and specific explanations to themselves when good events occur.)

See what happens when Susie is late coming home from the office. Husband Jim explains to himself that “she cares more about work than about me!” Susie explains to herself Jim is sulking because “he is ungrateful for the big paycheck I bring home!” and tells him so.

Jim defends himself by saying: “You never listen to me when I try and tell you how I feel!” Susie, being a pessimist, responds: “You’re nothing but a crybaby!”

Optimistic Scenario

Either partner could have stopped this negative spiral by interpreting events differently. Jim could have interpreted Susie’s lateness as a sign of what a hard worker she is and noted she is usually on time. Jim could have seen that her lateness had nothing to do with her love for him, remembering all the times in the past that Susie has put his needs first.

Susie if she had been an optimist could have seen that Jim’s sulking was a temporary state rather than a character flaw and tried to pull him out of it by pointing out that she really wanted to get home earlier, but her big account unexpectedly dropped by at 5 o’clock.

The optimistic marriage

The message is clear from both clinical experience and research; optimism helps marriage. When your partner does something that displeases you, try hard to find a believable, temporary, and specific explanation for it, i.e.: “He was tired;” “She must really be stressed,” instead of “He’s always inattentive,” or “He’s a grouch.”

On the other hand, when your partner does something great, amplify it with plausible explanations that are permanent (always) and pervasive (character traits), i.e.: “She is brilliant,” or “She is always at the top of her game,” as opposed to “The opposition caved in,” or “What a lucky day she had.”

About The Author

Dr. Tony Fiore is a So. California licensed psychologist, and anger management trainer. His company, The Anger Coach, provides anger and stress management programs, training and products to individuals, couples, and the workplace. Sign up for his free monthly newsletter “Taming The Anger Bee” at angercoach.com” target=”_new www.angercoach.com and receive two bonus reports.