There are few things in this world that are better than a great marriage or relationship. Antithetically, there are very few things worse than a lousy one! Statistics say half of all marriages end in divorce, and non-marriage relationships are even worse. Let’s face it; great relationships take a lot of work! So how can we “stack the deck” in favor of an AWESOME relationship? Each article in this four part series lists 13 keys for improving relationship intimacy!

1. Exercise together. Lift weights, jog, ride bikes, or whatever. Exercise increases your metabolism, helping you keep that girlish figure or cute butt (3 or more 30 minute sessions a week). It also releases endorphins (the same ones released during sexual intimacy). A growing number of studies confirm a correlation between regular aerobic exercise and sexual desire and ability, and intimacy in a relationship.

2. Find ways to assure your spouse that you are thinking of them when you are apart. Call one another at work or text message one another during the day. Send her flowers while she is traveling. Write her letters on the hotel stationary. Call late at night to say I couldn’t sleep without you by my side. Have the pizza boy bring a pizza with the message “All she said was she was dreaming about you!” That will give your intimacy a kick in the pants for sure!

3. Set up a Boys Night out for him. Would he enjoy an all night Bowl-a-Rama? How about cards till dawn? Or tickets to a tractor pull or a gun show? Use your imagination. He will surely show more intimacy as a result.

4. Plan a Girls Night Out for your wife and her best friends. Work with other husbands to plan a great evening where they can escape the routine. She will surely show more intimacy as a result.

5. Practice listening better and more often. Turn off the TV or radio and have a substantive discussion about the activities of the day, the needs of the children, or your plans and dreams for the future. Taking risks with one another is a relationship intimacy builder.

6. Catch your partner doing something that pleases you. Tell them why you are pleased, and how glad you are to have them in your life. Give them a big hug and kiss, and maybe a pat of encouragement. (Where you give the “Pat” is up to you, depending upon how intimate you feel!)

7. Buy your spouse a new watch. Have it inscribed with “I always have time for you!” Thoughtful gestures like that build relationship intimacy quickly.

8. Purchase an umbrella built for two then take a walk with it the next time it rains. It’ll force you to walk closely together, and you’ll soon be laughing and enjoying the intimacy of closeness.

9. Call your spouse’s parents. Find out about their favorite things as a child. Prepare an evening of their favorite childhood food, dessert, story, song, movie, and so on.

10. Discuss your responses to the question “what can I do to make our relationship and our intimacy more romantic and meaningful for you?” And of course you will want to fulfill those wants, needs, and desires of your spouse at every opportunity.

11. Have a wedding cake made for your anniversary. Invite friends over for cake, punch and wedding pictures. Make sure the friends know just how “special” you think your spouse is. Who knows, someone else’s relationship intimacy might get a boost as a result.

12. Always remember EVERY birthday, anniversary, holiday, and special occasion! You can lavish her with gifts 99 out of 100 times, and I guarantee you the only one she will remember is the one you forgot! If money is an issue, hand pick flowers, make a card, write a song or poem (it doesn’t have to be good – as long as it’s from your heart – she will love it and adore you for writing it!), grill hot dogs, go on a picnic, or whatever. Relationship intimacy doesn’t have to cost money!

13. Use all five of your senses to entertain and/or please your spouse. If you’ve forgotten, the five senses include seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching. Since this is a “G” rated article, I won’t get into any details. Let’s suffice to say, “Be creative and use your imagination!” You won’t believe how quickly relationship intimacy will climax.

Here is a tool for using these ideas. Go through the entire list together and rate each of the ideas. Ladies, place your numbers on the left side of each item. Gentlemen, place your ratings on the right side of each idea. Use the following rating scale:

1 = My Personal Favorites!

2 = I Would Love For You To Do This For Me!

3 = I Would Love To Do This For You!

4 = Let’s Discuss This Idea Further!

5 = There Ain’t No Way, Baby!

Have fun with this list of 13 ideas. The bottom line of each article in this series is really two-fold. First, I want you to learn to think of the wants, needs and desires of your spouse before you think of your own. Second, I want you to learn to have fun together again! Let your imagination run wild! Try actually doing the things listed in this article. If you will do just one activity each week from the entire series of articles, you will increase the intimacy in your relationship (at least once a week) for an entire year! You can find all the articles in this series in the Feature Articles Section of K-9 Outfitters, a Division of Damascus Road Enterprises.

Danny Presswood, 2006 All Rights Reserved.

Danny Presswood is a decorated retired US Army Combat (Airborne) Chaplain. He and his wife Cheri now live in the wooded Ozarks hills of SW MO. Presently working on his Doctorate, Danny writes the Feature Articles and Newsletter for K-9 Outfitters, A Division of Damascus Road Enterprises, which offers a plethora of AWESOME discount, luxury, unique, and Handmade in the USA Online Dog Supplies. Damascus-Road-Enterprises.com K-9 Outfitters, A Division of Damascus Road Enterprises.

Diamond spending – well, that is up to you. What to spend on a diamond is a tough and personal question. Two months’ salary is a guideline.

Chances are if you are looking for a diamond then you have heard that you should pay two months’ worth of salary. I would like to remind you that this won’t work for everybody. There are lots of other things to consider when looking at the cost.

* Diamond vs Setting

The two months’ salary rule applies to the whole engagement ring and not just the diamond. This means that you will have to find a balance between the price of the setting and the price of the diamond. Do you want a huge diamond and don’t really care about the setting or do you want a custom platinum setting with accent diamonds and then whatever diamond you can afford.

Whatever number you decide on you will then want to get the most ring and diamond for that amount of money. Shopping online for a diamond engagement ring is a very smart choice. The rings and the diamonds will be much cheaper and of better quality. A good online store will have a return policy that guarantees the ring for 30 days or more.

Note: The price of the ring does not represent how much you love that person.

A couple of things to consider.

Expectations – Your fiancée maybe expecting a very nice ring that is out of your budget. In this case you have two choices: go in debt or explain to her that that would not be a good idea to spend that kind of money especially before your wedding. In the end the price of the ring will impact her life because your financial situations will merge after the wedding. If she wants the big ring she will marry the debt also.

Buying a good quality diamond is an investment that will not lose money. In fifty years this diamond will be worth more than you paid for it. Just ask your dad how much he paid for your mom’s diamond.

Be practical. You must take a look at your lifestyle and your income to determine what you should spend. You will also need to look at whom you are going to give this diamond to. Does she like rock climbing and fixing fences or cruising on a yacht in the Mediterranean. When it comes down to it, most women would pick an engagement ring that is going to cost less than what you are going to spend.

WHY? Because women are practical (most). They will be impressed by whatever you get them because they know you put a lot of time and effort into selecting it.

Brock Hammill
Owner of online-diamond-buying.com online-diamond-buying.com – Helping people find the best diamonds on the internet.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau State and County QuickFacts, in 2005, California had an estimated population of 36,132,147. Taking into consideration the size of the population in California and the recent divorce statistics suggesting some 50% or more of all marriages in California will end in divorce, it is not surprising to see how there is a need for California divorce lawyers.

California has tens of thousands of California lawyers or California attorneys registered with the State Bar of California which is an indicator of how many California lawyers are needed. Of the tens of thousands of California lawyers practicing law in California some will go into practice as a divorce lawyer devoting all or some of their practice to the field of family law issues such as divorce or dissolution of marriage, paternity, domestic partnerships, child custody and visitation, domestic violence, restraining orders, spousal support, child support, guardianship, adoptions, community property, division of property, and more.

California divorce lawyers will generally practice family law in at least one California county. Typically the county will be the county in which the California divorce lawyer’s office is located. However, it is not unusual for a California divorce lawyer to practice law in multiple counties within California. There are approximately 58 Superior Courts in California in which a California divorce lawyer may choose to practice family law such as the Superior Court of California County of Alameda, Alpine, Amador , Butte, Calaveras, Colusa, Contra Costa, Del Norte, El Dorado, Fresno, Glenn, Humboldt, Imperial, Inyo, Kern, Kings, Lake, Lassen, Los Angeles, Madera, Marin, Mariposa, Mendocino, Merced, Modoc, Mono, Monterey, Napa, Nevada, Orange, Placer, Plumas, Riverside, Sacramento, San Benito, San Bernardino, San Diego, San Francisco, San Joaquin, San Luis Obispo, San Mateo, Santa Barbara, Santa Clara, Santa Cruz, Shasta, Sierra, Siskiyou, Solano, Sonoma, Stanislaus, Sutter, Tehama, Trinity, Tulare, Tuolumne, Ventura, Yolo, or Yuba.

Some California divorce lawyers practicing law in California will seek out a special family law certification by the State Bar of California or an organization accredited by the State Bar of California. Currently, California has hundreds of Certified Family Law Specialists (CFLS) registered with the State Bar of California. The percentage of all the California lawyers in California who actually seek to become Certified Family Law Specialists (CFLS) is relatively low. Although California divorce lawyers are not required to have such a certification to practice family law it does allow the California divorce lawyer to advertise as a specialist in the field of family law.

Considering the size of the population in California, the high divorce rate in California, and the number of California divorce lawyers practicing family law in California, it is not surprising to see how there is a growing need for California divorce lawyers among consumers today.

Copyright © 2007 Child Custody Coach

childcustodycoach.com Child Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. thecustodycoach.com “How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. custodymatch.com Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.

Online dating in some single’s eyes seems to be something to fear. They’re curious enough to have a peek at what the online dating service looks like, and offers them, but then they leave. This is the point when they could be creating a profile that will be seen by thousands of eligible singles, then lead them into a fulfilling relationship.

Online dating is still, after all these years, something a lot of singles are still afraid of trying. They get right up to the door, but for one reason or another don‘t want to enter. Only they know the reason why they wouldn’t want to increase their chances of meeting someone. They have the opportunity of meeting one of thousands of singles they would never bump into offline.

Maybe they’re worried that someone they know will see their profile. This is just something that they have planted in their own mind. If someone sees their profile they’re obviously curious about online dating as well.

There’s no difference in trying to meet a partner online as there is offline. It’s just like shopping. Some people do it offline, and now millions of people are doing it online. People change with the times. There’s no reason not to put a free profile on a few online dating services to see which one will reap the best rewards. Someone stepping out of their comfort zone often has many more benefits than staying in their comfort zone.

A lot of singles still see online dating as something that isn’t safe. Talking to someone that you don’t know is a lot safer online than it is in a bar or club. For one they’re in the safety of their own home, and they’re not getting drunk, and losing their inhibitions. Talking online gives someone the chance to get to know someone before that first date. It’s easy to see how serious someone is looking for a relationship just by looking at their profile.

After the online introduction comes the next fear of the first date. Again a first date will happen no matter what method anyone has used for dating. Even a date arranged by friends can turn bad. At least with meeting them online first there has been some sort of connection. Early signs to look for if it doesn’t feel right are being rushed into the first date. If a single is not allowing another single to date at their own pace they they’re probably not going to change once they have met them. With all the other thousands of singles online dating in every major city it isn’t hard to start communicating with someone else.

Online dating is a very safe and rewarding place to meet a partner. Millions of singles are finding this out every month, and have made the decision to take control of their life, and meet someone. And thousands of singles are now in a happy relationship with someone they would never had met if it wasn’t for creating their profile.

For more online dating advice, and online dating reviews visit – the-online-dating-reviews.com the-online-dating-reviews.com

A relationship can experience it fluxes and flows, but a strong, stable relationship will withstand the difficult times and grow stronger. There are several areas, though, that are often overlooked by couples. These areas should not be ignored because they can be detrimental to the relationship. Any one of these can lead to another problem or even several. It is best to go in to the relationship with your eyes open and as prepared as possible. As long as you stay aware and are proactive you may be able to save your relationship.

Lack of Communication


When you stop communicating with your partner, you relationship will go downhill fast. Communication is key to maintaining the bond with your partner. A good method of communication is just to talk. Simple, yes, but there is more. Each partner gets a certain amount of time (5 or 8 minutes) to talk with no interruptions. The other partner should pay attention and really listen to their partner. If they must, take notes for things that may require a rebuttal or extra attention.

Incompatibility


Sometimes things just don’t work out. Some people are not meant to be together and it is important that you can realize that. Do not mistake comfort or fear of change for love. If you are incompatible with your partner but you think that it can be rectified, then try to work it out. If you can’t work it out, it may be necessary to cut your losses and move on.

Lack of Respect


Lack of respect has no place in a relationship. If your partner does not respect you or you can not respect your partner, but you need to take steps to correct that. Try counseling to correct this massive problem but if you can not respect your partner or he or she can’t or won’t respect you then it is time to move on. Respect is vital in any relationship and if it is absent then the relationship really does not have a leg to stand on, meaning that it is weak and fragile.

Money Arguments


Financial disagreements are one of the top three reasons that couples divorce. There has to be open communication and complete honesty when it comes to financial matters. If you feel that you can not be honest with your partner then there is a greater underlying problem and counseling is necessary. However, if you can talk openly with your partner, then set up a budget together. Decide what money goes where and establish a “play fund” for the two of you. Then stick to that budget and work together to make it work.

Infatuation vs Love


What is the difference between infatuation and love? Different people have different ideas. Bottom line, though, is that infatuation is short term and love is lasting. Infatuation tends to burn brightly at first, but once the honeymoon period wears off, infatuation has nothing left to talk about while love can find so many more things to love about your partner.

How To Deal With A Break Up is an online portal with expert howtodealwithabreakup.com break up articles and reviews. Visit howtodealwithabreakup.com howtodealwithabreakup.com for free relationship advice and tips.

This tip is very important. Make sure that you’re bathroom is immaculate. Women will judge you on how your bathroom looks. If your bathroom looks like a gas station public restroom with piss splattered on the floor or toilet seat, rings around the commode, pubic hair stuck to the seat, pungent smell, you’re in big trouble. Women are turned off by a dirty toilet and this will make a bad impression on her. It could even cause her not to want to date you.

Here’s some tips on bathroom decorating that will really make a good impression on her. Always have good brands on display of colognes, salon purchased shampoo, Clinique men’s products, hair sprays, etc. Single women really relate to this stuff. Also, keep on hand big fluffy terry-towels, two robes, extra new toothbrush (still in the package), etc.

A final word on your bathtub and shower. Make damn sure they are spotless. Women will check it out while they’re using your restroom to see if you have clean habits. Rings around the tub, algae on the sides of the shower, dirty shower curtain, pubic hairs, are going to turn her off and make you look like a slob.

Guys, I just can’t express how important it is to have a clean bathroom when you’re dating single women. A dirty bathroom may not be a big deal to you, but single women are different and they will judge you on if you keep a clean bathroom. So, why not just keep it clean and well-stocked so you will make a favorable impression on her and make her attracted to you because you have clean habits.

This article written by Don Diebel (Americas #1 Singles
Expert). If you would like more free dating tips on how to
successfully meet, date, attract, and become intimate with
women, please visit his website at: getgirls.com getgirls.com.

From Booby-Trapped to Treasured Chest

1. Why breast? Why now?
At the same time, during 1940’s when large female breasts were ‘discovered’ as the most efficient vehicle for promoting merchandize, advertisements agencies started using the image of large size female breasts for selling everything from toothpaste to cars.
The wishes of women, who perceived their breasts to be too small, came true with the invention of breast implants.

Now, with the advances of science, medicine, technology and art, the age of breast enhancement is here to stay. Millions of women volunteer to change their breast size and shape with hope to feel sexier, attractive or even just ‘normal’, the new normal that is.

2. Shame: The new emotion of our generation
Never before had the emotion ‘shame’ been self-inflicted on an entire generation of women.
Ask a healthy cheer-leader, a mother of three or a post-menopause grandmother: what is one body-part that ‘cost’ you the most energy, fantasy, grief, pride, pleasure and shame? Well, breasts will often be the first choice, while nose and hair will occupy far second and third choices…

Many women now treat their breasts as foreign objects. Our culture is only too happy to play along with their perceptions, frustrations and hopes.
All past generations, since the beginning of time, were concerned with women breasts as well. However, size and shape were not on anybody’s mind.
The true function of female breasts – breast feeding – was the main interest of the human family.
Shame for the appearance of one’s breasts is culture’s invention of the past several decades.

3. Large enough breasts on a size zero female body – the new dilemma
According to women fashion magazines and the entertainment industry; a female’s body size of zero with large size breasts is the new standard of beauty. This standard is running havoc in the body-image and health of millions of young women.
However, as you know, breasts are partially made of fat cells. The logic that follows is that very thin women would not develop large size breasts, right?
Well, who needs logic when you can have it all?
The combined forces of breast obsession and unhealthy body image have inspired the solution to the dilemma. Now a very thin body with large breast implants is the latest ‘hot look’ for women of all ages.

4. ‘Looking sexy’ is not necessarily feeling sexy
Body image is the perceptions/fantasies/wishes and sometime negative feelings we attach to our live body.
A woman could walk into a department store, buy all the latest fashions, cosmetics and accessories and be told by an army of sales associates, friends and lovers that she looks great, sexy, attractive and so on.
Coming home, removing the make-up and clothes: will those feelings linger?
In most cases that I have interviewed, encountered and treated, the looks of the person did not transmit the message to the body: I feel sexy.
The gap between feeling one’s powers and identity vs. one’s looks is widening. The reason for the gap is the barrages of messages around us combined with too little knowledge of our own body.

5. Teens and breast implants; the unseen dangers
Did you hear that the most popular high school graduation gift for girls is breast implants? Well, you have heard the wrong information. The car is back as the gift of choice for the graduates. And breast implants? Don’t worry, they did not disappear; they are the imperative gift for the Sweet Sixteen!
The danger here is that the process of sexualizing the mind of the young girl is starting before the fully developed body gave the signals: I am ready.
This process is irreversible. No therapists, drugs or treatments can give your child back their innocence.
Breast implants on a child of sixteen, or anytime before maturity is damaging and permanent.

6. Are men breast obsessed? Are women?
Men are attracted to women’s bodies and body-parts for the survival of our species.
Some men are attracted to a certain female’s body part more than other parts.
However, in the last couple of decades women ‘took over’ the lead and fascination with size and shape of females’ breast as their own interests. These days, breasts and other body-part obsessions and the industries behind them service women’s body image needs.

7. Is there a way out from obsession?
Yes.
The healing of an obsession is a process that encompasses one’s mental health, strength of character, spirituality and more.
It will engage your self awareness: are you aware of obsessions/preoccupations interfering with the quality of your life?
Breast obsession and body image issues are now a mental health hazard with a lot of painful consequences. In many instances you can see the beginning of the obsessions in boys and girls early on in their teen years.
Yes, I did say boys. We ‘teach’ boys at very young age how mom and dad are fascinated by large breasts… It’s somewhat like a code we are passing down the generations.
Therefore, one of the best ways to deal with the young generation’s skewed outlook on the human body is to treat it as a family issue.
There are powerful results when energy is focused on positive, healthy aliveness rather than the concerns of breast obsessions and body image issues.

How would you like to improve, strengthen or even save, in some cases, your own relationship with your body? Your intimate relationship? For background information on Dr. Nili Sachs please visit DrNili.com DrNili.com For relationship coaching and /or therapy appointment please contact Dr. Nili directly: mailto:nilisachs@msn.com nilisachs@msn.com Dr. Nili Sachs’s recent book: Booby-Trapped, How to Feel Normal in a Breast-Obsessed World.

When I try to describe love with words, I can’t help but to think of the injustice and degradation that has been associated with the word “love.” Therefore, if my attempt to paint a picture of how I see love doesn’t work, please know that I tried. We are all able to give a value to the amount of love we receive or witness. For example, “I love him a little” and “I love her a lot” are commonly used phrases in everyday conversation. Therefore, I ask myself, if there’s a value that we are assessing to the amount of love one sees or feels from where is this “source” coming from? What has been the biggest example of love?

For Christians, the source of the purest love comes from God just as Paul says, …God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us (Romans 5:5). Moreover, the nutrient fueling any version of hope is love and as a young man of 25 years, it is very important that I understood the “power of love” and how valuable it is to love the people around me. Because it is written, “…love covers a multitude of sin.” The Bible tells us to love many things: our wives, children, each other, and most of all our Lord and Savior – Jesus Christ. As a matter of fact, Paul says in I Corinthians 16:14. Do everything in love – don’t do anything without love! And when you obey God’s Word, God’s love is truly made complete in you.

Love for the most part to many seem as if it were a mystery. This mystery can drive some to believe that true absolute love doesn’t exist. Well, I’m here to tell you that everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God (I John 4:7). Thus if you don’t love, then you don’t know God because love is God; hence the mystery. And this love is administered even without your consent. If no one on this Earth loves you, the love God has for you is enough to sustain you for a more than prosperous life. Love is patient, love is kind, love never fails, and love is sincere. Find comfort and refuge in understanding what it means for God to love you-personally. In a nutshell, without love we are nothing because we gain nothing. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres (I Corinthians 13).

For the greatest amount of love already has been demonstrated to the whole world when Christ died: For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16). In addition, the Lord Jesus Christ says, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” I urge everyone to seek this kind of love, even from your mate. Find out what the Word of God speaks is telling you in your heart; love is the fruit of the Spirit, and you must eat of it to truly know what it means to be loved. Love is not about chocolates, flowers, kisses, and get away vacations.

Love is not about telling your spouse/friend, “I love you”. As a matter of fact, I’m going to go in with John on this and plead with you that we don’t love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. It’s really a simple concept. Everyday, I am seeking to immerse myself in as much as God’s love as I can and if I find a woman who loves God, loves her sisters and brothers, and loves herself, as such, then I know I found a good thing! Fellas, you have to know when you found a good thing. Ladies, you have to know when someone has deservingly found you. And how do you know? Stay in touch with the source, it’ll never fail you. God sets many laws for us to follow, however, He sets no law on, joy peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, and the greatest of them all, love (Galatians 5:22-23). Don’t limit your amount of love to come to you—there’s an infinite amount of love to get everyone through a lifetime. If you don’t know what love is, it’s good that you don’t know so you can find out. Since, love begins as an action, and not as a feeling you have to do something to really know what love is. May your understanding of love grow deeper and deeper, and the amount which you are able to love grows more and more each day of your life. I hate to see others go through a day where they feel unloved, and substitute love with foolishness. So this is my challenge for everyone: seek the purest love available and feel what it’s like to be truly loved.

Leon Paul is a God-fearing young man who strives to enlighten minds with the knowledge of God’s love. His main goal in life is to win souls for the Kingdom of the Living God. He resides in Los Angeles, California.

Human Relations: Death of Friendship

Call it “Lack of Proper Time Management” or “Change in behavior or attitude of Human Being”;
Call it “Gift of 21st Century” or “Our Greediness “;
Call it “Being Opportunistic” or “Facing Cut-Throat Competition…
Call it a step to “Avoid Over Commitment” or a “precautionary measure”
Call it by any name but “Human Relations” are dying and the first one to go is “Friendship”.

In the present century, when we all are busy, we all are running behind growth and prosperity; during the time when people don’t have time for their family members, time when parents are not having time for their kids; spouses see each other only on weekends; youngsters are too busy in making best of the available opportunities and don’t have time for their parents/elders; when you meet your siblings only the time of festivals or family functions, do you think that you have time for your friends? Time is a constraint. So, the question here is that do we really need friends? Or we just need people to use them as a ladder for our success and growth?

Do you remember, in your school days, whom do you use to reach for your homework? Do you know, in your college life, who use to give your attendance, in your absence? Did you ever-said “thanks” to those people? We have become selfish. We are in competition with everybody…known or unknown; family or friends…and at times this is not a healthy competition.

Someone asked me, “Friendship”? Which ship is this? So, dear friends…friendship is a “ship” which takes to safely to the shore when sea is not silent; when waves are high…when there is Tsunami. Friends can be from anywhere in the world, of any race, religion, and gender or any age. We all know that in the world, at times families and relatives are not able to help us at the time when we actually need…its during that time we need friends. But, we human are having tendency that we assume things around us as permanent. Friends, nothing is permanent. If you have struggled your way from bad time to good time…then even good time is also not here to stay…it will also change. You used few people, by calling them as your friends, while moving up in your career, never acknowledging their efforts, support or help. So, when you fall again, who will support you…who will be with you? Your friends. Friendship is a strange thing. We find ourselves telling our friends the deepest details of our lives…things we don’t even share with our families who raised us. But what is a friend? A confidant? A lover? A shoulder to cry on? An ear to listen? A heart to feel?…A friend is all these things…and more. No matter where we met, I call you friend. A word so small…yet so large in feeling. A word filled with emotion. It is true, great things come in small packages.

On the subject of friendship between males and females you can read my write-up Can a Male and Female be JUST Friends? at ezinearticles.com/?Can-a-Male-and-Female-be-JUST-Friends?&id=39392

I have seen people; many people also came to me at the time when they were in need…need of any help, any information…saying that they want to be friendly with me. If I helped them…they moved on…never turned back even to say thanks and if I refused to help…they gave some ill wishes and again moved on. That is “opportunistic friendship”.

I understand that we are busy and we all are running against the time. We don’t have time to even take care of our family and ourselves. But, friends…one call, just one call in a month or one SMS in a week, is all that it takes to be in touch with your friends. Let them feel special…let them feel happy about this relationship. You never know, when you need people around you…when you need the support of your friends. Just be in touch with them.

Once again, it is not a lecture or advice. I am not preaching. It is your life and it is for you to decide with whom you want to be in touch with and when. “It is difficult to find good people. It is more difficult to have such people as your friends. If you have such good people as your friends, stay in touch with them and never lose them.

A small gift and a dear friend: I am fortunate enough to have quite a few good people around me and they are my friends. This write-up is dedicated to one such friend of mine, Shankar Anappindi. Dada, when my life was all zig-zag…things were not moving in the way I wanted them to move…and I was in need of support, I looked around and there were no one. Then, one hand came from the back…to hold my hand…to give me all that I was need at that time. It was you. I am thankful to you for all that you have done for me. It is because of that support, that confidence…that love and care that today I am standing here. In the world where even close relations do not support and care, you came as an angel into my life. Once again thanks a lot. You are a flower in my garden that makes up my bouquet.

My friends, you all make a very impressive display

Looking forward to your comments and opinion.

With love and care

Sanjeev Himachali
(Chandigarh – India)
(Mobile: 91-9876328841)
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The problem with choosing a dating service is choice — too much of it! There are hundreds of services. To choose a dating service that’s right for you, you need to be clear about what exactly you’re looking for. As a newcomer to online dating, unfamiliar with all the options, you might be a little hazy on this front. Here’s a rundown of the main areas in which dating services differ which will help you draw up a dating service wish list to compare sites to.

Relationship options

One of the most obvious things to think about when choosing a dating service is what kind of relationship(s) you’re looking for.

Some services, including top dating sites like Yahoo! Personals (singles dating) and eHarmony (soulmates) focus on one type of relationship only. The advantage of choosing a dating service that’s dedicated to a particular type of relationship is that everyone will be on exactly the same page as you are in terms of intentions.

If you’re not clear what your intentions are, you might be better choosing a dating service where members can pursue different types of relationships within the same site. Again there’s no shortage of choice. However, at some multi-relationship services it’s not immediately clear who’s looking for what and up to you to figure it out, using the search tools. If this sounds like trouble (and it can be), choose a service like Lavalife which has separate communities within the site for each type of relationship.

Members

Think about the type of person you want to meet. Are you open-minded, in which case a mainstream service will be fine, or do you have a lengthy list of “must haves” regarding your perfect match?

If you have set ideas about the type of person you’d like to meet, finding them in a mainstream service could be like looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack. (By “mainstream”, I mean that members are as diverse as the general population.) Instead, consider choosing a relationship service that specializes in bringing people together who have something very specific in common — religion, political beliefs, ethnicity, body size, certain lifestyles, you name it.

Simply run a search for “dating (or matchmaking, or marriage)” plus whatever you’re looking for (vegetarian, republican, biker…) and it’s almost certain you’ll find a relationship service to match.

Matchmaking features

Dating sites have thousands if not millions of members so good search tools are important. However, it’s still up to you search out your perfect match and not everyone has time for this. Luckily many dating services have matchmaking features (more sophisticated search tools) that will help you find “the one” quickly and easily.

Matchmaking features range from the very simple, based on profiles and/or basic wish lists, to the sophisticated, based on personality and other tests as well as more detailed profiles and wish lists. Unless you’re unusually picky (or just very unusual), these one-click options will typically churn up a good selection of possible matches on a regular basis — popular dating services attract many new members a day. You can usually opt to have these matchmaking searches run automatically on a regular basis and receive new match details by email — another time-saver.

At some services, matchmaking features are part of a complete matchmaking service where the selection process is much stricter, usually because they’re geared towards serious relationships. Typically you’ll receive just a handful of potential partners over a length of time. For example, eHarmony (designed to help people into marriage) advises clients not to expect more than one or two matches a month. To accept this level of matchmaking you have to be happy with the idea of letting the “experts” have the final say about who’s right for you and who’s not.

Tests

Online dating services are about much more than dating. They’re also an opportunity to gain some valuable insights into yourself and the type of person you’re looking to meet which could help improve your love life, online and off. If this appeals to you, choose a dating service with personality and other tests for members to take.

For the most part, larger, well established online dating services have the most insightful and detailed personality tests because they have more resources to put into their design. Almost all personality tests are free to take and at many sites matchmaking tools draw on the results to find members who are compatible with each other. So, by taking several tests and judging the results, you’ll get a good idea of which site is going to do the best job of helping you find your perfect match. After all, if the results are a true reflection of what you’re like, they’ll be a true reflection of potential matches too.

Communications

There are two levels of communication to consider when choosing a dating service — what you get for free and what you get as a paying member. On both fronts, some services offer a lot more than others.

Free communications matter because they let you get to know someone, or at least that the interest is mutual, before you spring for a subscription. (A subscription will let you communicate as much as you like.) At most services, free communications are limited to flirty icons and preset messages that members send to each other, but search around. Some services are much more generous than others.

Once you subscribe, the norm for communicating is by on-site email and instant messaging. Many of the top dating services, Yahoo! Personals included, have stuck with this simple set up and show no sign of changing any time soon. Others, like Match.com, are continuously adopting new technologies to offer members more communications options. Typically you’ll pay more so think about whether or not you really need to to be able to access their services anytime, anywhere.

Entertainment

Think about what sort of experience you’d like to have with online dating services. Do you intend to focus on finding your perfect match or would you like to enjoy other activities as well? Many services offer entertainment features including light-hearted quizzes and polls, contests, articles and newsletters, as well as chat rooms and the option to sign up to meet new friends as well as dates.

Offline activities

If the idea of meeting someone online then having to meet them face-to-face at some stage is a little intimidating, look for a dating service that helps members meet and mingle, casually and as part of a group, offline too. Though some dating services go as far as offering singles holidays, offline activities usually involve meeting for concerts, shows and other events in your area or elsewhere.

You can get that all-important “feel” for someone in relaxed atmosphere with plenty of food for conversation and make as much or as little of the occasion as you like. If you haven’t met someone yet, offline activities are an opportunity to meet someone you might like to continue chatting with online, with the advantage that you’ve already met.

International dating

If you’re away from your native country, would like to chat in your native language or are planning to relocate or travel to a different country, some of the more established and successful online dating services have extended their services into countries other than the US. For example, Yahoo! Personals has a new Canadian service while Match.com is live in 27 different countries.

Cost & Payment Options

Most online dating services charge about the same for a subscription — between $20 and $25 a month — so cost isn’t going to be much of a deciding factor when choosing a dating service. Instead, look for value — services might charge about the same but there are big differences in what you get for your money. Also, check out payment options. Several dating services accept money orders and checks as well as the usual credit cards.

Find out what discounts will be available if you sign up for several months at once, and if any special offers are available. Finally on this one, look for free trials and try out all the extra subscriber features before committing to a subscription.

More resources to help you choose a dating service

When you’ve drawn up a checklist of what you’d like in a dating service (and hopefully this article has helped) choosing a dating service will be a lot easier. You can compare your checklist to dating service reviews and, for more specific details, explore FAQs, help pages and “take a tour” options (all good dating services have these). And don’t forget, signing up is free and you can usually explore sites without having to post a profile first. Most of all, though it’s important to choose a dating service that’s right for you, one you’ll enjoy using and are mostly like to have success with, choosing a dating service should be fun. If one dating service doesn’t work out for you, move on and choose another!

Caroline Mackenzie is Co-Owner/Webmaster of The Dating Muse, a guide to online dating services and personals featuring reviews of the top online dating sites plus tips and ideas for finding friends, dates, soulmates and sexual adventure online. You can visit her site at DatingMuse.com DatingMuse.com and subscribe to her newsletter at datingmuse.com/subscribe.htm datingmuse.com/subscribe.htm