While the traditional wedding guestbook serves an important function, more and more couples — and wedding planners — are steering away from the time-tested in favor of something more personal. That’s especially true for brides and grooms having a relaxed second wedding, or those who simply enjoy a dynamic relationship and powerful personalities. Traditional guestbooks are great, but one-of-a-kind alternatives can be even better!

So, you’re sold — you’ve decided to put together a more totally-you memento of your guests than that little quilted journal and feather pen. And yet, it’s a struggle to come up with the perfect idea. Never fear … with a little brainstorming, you’ll find yourself armed with several original choices.

While you ponder, ask yourself questions about what makes you stand out as a couple. What are your hobbies? Do you play any instruments? How do you like to spend your free time? What tantalizing spot did you pick for your honeymoon? Take mental note of your talents and passions … or prized possessions. Answering basic questions like these should help you develop a fresh and personal spin on the traditional guestbook.

Here are a few quick ideas to help you get started:

• Blessed with musical talent? If you play the guitar, keep an eye out for miniature or older, not-necessarily-playable guitars at music shops, thrift stores, and so on. Buy some Sharpies and clear acrylic spray, so the surface can be signed and sealed for years to come. You can make similar modifications to instruments like banjos, mandolins, violins. Actually, with a little creativity you could probably convert almost any instrument!

• Crazy for sports? If so, consider signing memorabilia or sporting goods equipment related to your favorite sports or teams. Hockey players are sure to appreciate a signed hockey stick they can mount in a shadow box or simply hang from a wall. If you’d like to play this down a bit, just frame a picture of yourselves dressed in your favorite team’s jerseys (or going to a sporting event) and leave plenty of ink-friendly matting around the frame.

• Love to travel? Look for artifacts or souvenirs that can be signed and framed or displayed after the ceremony. Fans of the Far East might enjoy a signed kimono. A safari jacket might be perfect for Africa aficionados. Most countries lend themselves to some type of apparel or indigenous piece of art that’s simple to convert into a customized guestbook alternative.

• It’s also worth mentioning that the number of couples going with a Signature Platter is on the rise. Why? Because not only is a signed platter a great way to remember your special day, it’s one of the few “guestbooks” that can actually become part of your daily routine.

These are hardly your only possibilities for novel alternatives to the traditional guestbook. With a little creativity, brainstorming and research, you shouldn’t have any trouble finding a “guestbook” that’s as perfect for your wedding as you are for each other.

About the Author

Blake Kritzberg is editor of favorideas.com favorideas.com. View our

Flirting is a whole-body experience. It engages the eyes, tickles the mind, and awakens the senses.

While you may think that flirting is something we learn, there is plenty of evidence to suggest that we are born knowing how to flirt. Flirting behaviors are exhibited by dozens of cultures and animals from birds to fruit flies.

Research into human mating behaviors at bars and clubs have revealed that successful flirtations all go through a similar sequence of events. Nonverbal cues such as arching brows, swaying hips, and tossing hair all cue a man that you’re interested. Once one of you breaks the ice by speaking, the other person has the option of turning towards you, acknowledging your presence, or turning away.

If it’s the former, and all goes well, your conversation will lead to deeper interest as both of you lean forward and your gazes wander from the face to other parts of the body. The sense of touch becomes involved as you touch his hand in empathy, or he puts an arm gently on your back to guide you through the crowd.

As the night wears on, your bodies will eventually become “synchronized.” In other words, your body position and movements will mimic the other person’s. When he glances down, you will glance down. When you pick up your glass to take a sip, he will pick up his. At this point, you can congratulation yourself on a successful flirtation: you’re both clearly interested, and it’s time for exchanging phone numbers.

What does this research mean to us? It’s all very well to know how flirtation works, but how can we nudge it along?

Today I’m going to give you three flirting techniques backed up by science that are guaranteed to get you to that initial conversation with a man.

1. The Best Flirtation Technique of All Time

First of all, what’s the single most successful technique that women can use to invite a man to approach?

(a) Ask for his help with something?
(b) Toss your hair while gazing straight at him?
(c) Dance seductively by yourself?
(d) Give him a big smile?

Got your answer?

The winner, hands-down, is (d) Smile.

It’s amazing that something so simple could have such an amazing effect, but men around the world will tell you the same thing. When men are getting up the courage to approach a woman, most will pick the average, friendly-looking girl over the beautiful, bored ice princess.

Approachability matters. A smile shows a man that you’re friendly, that you’re willing to acknowledge him, and that he won’t have to fear getting rejected when he approaches you.

Plus, a smile puts us in our best light. Studies have shown that women with open, friendly body language are perceived as more attractive than women with closed, negative body language. Quite simply, a smile is the cheapest beauty treatment you can apply.

2. Do I See You?

Next, there’s nothing more crucial to a developing flirtation than eye contact. This is where shyness can be a great hindrance. If you are too shy, embarrassed, or overwhelmed by butterflies to meet his gaze, he may think that you are rejecting him.

On the other end of the scale, a steady gaze is equally disconcerting. In the animal kingdom, a stare is a threatening nonverbal behavior, and human beings find it creepy. Someone who steals a glance at you is infinitely preferable to someone who checks you out brazenly without hiding his gaze.

Eye contact should be brief, a mere recognition that both of you see one another, and then ended by glancing down. After all, lowering your lashes can be as seductive as meeting his gaze in the first place, especially if it’s accompanied by a shy smile. Up your seduction power by glancing at him again within thirty seconds to a minute after your first glance.

3. He Can’t Flirt with You if He Can’t Get to You!

Last of all, make sure that you are physically accessible to being approached! We often go out in groups, and there’s nothing more intimidating to a man than a woman surrounded by a half-dozen of her best friends.

Very few men will feel comfortable braving the stares of your friends while he tries to chat you up, so if you are out with a group, give any secret admirers a chance to approach you when you’re on your own. Excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, or go buy a round of drinks. Keep your body language open and scan the room with your eyes. Some women even dance by themselves to allow a man the opportunity to approach.

Similarly, don’t be in such a hurry to get to your destination that you are gone before Mr. Perfect can raise his hand to wave you down. Take your time, enjoy the journey, and keep your eyes open and your head up. A woman who’s strolling pleasantly and looking around her is much more approachable than a woman who’s striding down the street, lost in thought.

If you enjoyed these flirting tips, there’s so much more to learn! Discover my FREE “How to Be Irresistible to Men” newsletter series and 6-Part Mini-Course, chockfull of great tips on how to do everything from getting more male attention to online dating. It’s all backed by the latest research into how men and women meet and mate. Sign up for this 100% FREE newsletter by visiting my website:

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Not a person alive has kept in touch with all the friends they’ve had, unless they haven’t really lived. If they’ve kept pretty much to themselves for many years, it’s possible they still have close ties to some of the best friends they had in high school, but no one else. So what are the rest of us supposed to do, when people we thought were friends just move on?

If they just stop calling or visiting us, we can suppose we might have said or done something to offend them, whether it seemed like an offense to us or not. If they offer no explanation, we can only surmise they’ve found someone more exciting to be around, perhaps someone with more money to throw about, or more ability to provide the right connections in a gain-oriented society. Maybe they’ve encountered someone else to share amusements that we no longer enjoy, have outgrown, or didn’t fancy in the first place.

Perhaps we come with “too much baggage” and they’re overburdened with worries of their own at this time. We might be suffering through unemployment or disability, and they’re afraid we might ask them for a loan. In any of these cases, a silent prayer for their future comfort and satisfaction can send them on their way into their own uncertainty. Or a muttered Good riddance! can do the same thing, depending on the depth of the wound inflicted. Yet harboring resentment will corrode our souls more than theirs, though their consciences will trouble them from time to time.

On the other hand, if they’ve physically moved for employment or other reasons, it can be a definite burden to keep in touch. At the very least, it requires motivation, followed by effort to do so. The friends who’ve endured the move have a long period of adjustment to negotiate, no matter how long the dream has been in coming. One party may be in a much stronger position to keep the lines of communication open than the other, but “one-way friendships” tend to grow hollow. Are they the ones writing all the letters or sending all the e-mails?

Nowadays, with cheap long distance rates and near-universal access to e-mail in a civilized country, there’s little excuse for elastic silences, not where there’s genuine caring and motivation to keep in touch. Even so, people continue to grow and develop by the hour, and in the course of doing just that, encounter new hobbies, interests, and responsibilities that occupy much of their time. Sometimes, folks just get sidetracked by the very real demands of living, trying to keep up with an endless list of the maintenance chores of life. People drift apart without meaning to.

If people have inherited a windfall of some kind, maintaining the ties with old friends becomes extremely difficult for a number of reasons. As we might expect, friends we didn’t know we had will come out of the woodwork on hearing such news! Not to mention the suddenly mushy relatives who haven’t given us the time of day in years. Windfalls bring trials as well as blessings, needing to be handled from the start with caution and professional advice.

Early on, those receiving the additional income usually need to move to a different neighborhood for safety reasons, and to maintain a semblance of privacy, to which we’re all entitled anyway. Jealous old friends and family may feel resentment and will undoubtedly make sarcastic comments, especially if they don’t receive “their share” promptly or ever. They may send begging letters that are worse than those received from a thousand new charities. Finally, the newly wealthy individual will be expected to foot the bill every time he/she goes to lunch or dinner, or to a show with old friends. If that’s what the person wants to do, fine, but to be obligated to do so is a drag. It will also drain funds faster than a reckless spouse with a credit card.

Were they really friends? And what are we supposed to do when they move on? It’s been my experience that some friendships are meant to be transitional. Some friends are sent to us simply to help us over some of the rougher roads in life, or across the more terrifying suspension bridges. We can be grateful they were there, when we would otherwise have been alone. Friends who turned out to be disloyal can be forgotten, while we cherish those genuine people who remain in our lives. Looking forward, we can remember to extend a hand of friendship to the many new souls who will come into our lives, now and in the future, a hand of friendship whose partner contains no ulterior motive.

© 2002 Shirley Ann Parker Reprinted from The Corner Desk

Shirley Ann Parker is a full-time technical writer, and the author of Discoveries: A Journey Through Life and other works of fiction. Visit her website at shirleyannparker.com shirleyannparker.com to read more about her work, or buy Discoveries at bbotw.com bbotw.com and other online bookstores. Additional creative endeavors can be found at cafeshops.com/topazcoveplus cafeshops.com/topazcoveplus

Internet dating has become a huge phenomena. Many guys don’t have time to meet women in person. That’s why dating sites have become really popular.

Meeting women in person takes time and effort. Online dating on the other hand can take seconds. That’s why the internet is such a great tool.

Having a great profile will increase your chances in getting women to message you. The major problem guys have is they fill out profiles as if they’re filling out a resume. They say all the wrong things.

If you check the profile of many guys, you’ll read about what they like to do for fun, what they want in a woman, what they do for a living, etc. The point of the profile is to give a woman a reason to message you. By listing what all the other guys list, women will think you’re just like everyone else.

You want to stimulate the woman’s mind. The following are things you should not place in your profile.
“Ask me” or single worded answers. This tells women you’re lazy and how is she suppose to gain interest if you put no effort in the profile?
“I’m really friendly” Being ‘friendly’ does not excite women.
“I love this and I love that” Women don’t care what you love. They’ll care to know after they develop some kind of interest in you. The profile helps set a first impression. You must use it to stimulate the woman’s mind. All guys talk about what they like. You must be different!
“I only use this site when I’m bored”. All that does is tell the woman you’re not an interesting person. Do you like boring women? Exactly my point.
Don’t “TyPe LiKe THiS” From my understanding, it’s the GaNGSTa way of typing. If you want a mature sexy woman, type normal.
Spelling errors. If you’re not good at spelling, I recommend typing your profile in a word processor like Microsoft Word and use spell check. Once that’s complete, just copy and paste the corrected info in your profile.
Leaving your profile blank. I’ve done tests and got many more replies by women when I have a profile with stuff written in.
No picture. Always have a picture up. It’s best to have from 2-3 pictures of you in different settings. When a woman sees no picture, they avoid speaking to the person. If they see one and the quality is too good, they may think it’s a model picture which was taken from a different source. If you have 2-3 they’ll believe it’s really you. I notice some girls take around 68 pictures of themselves with their webcam. That’s over doing it.
Bragging about anything. All it does is communicate to women that you’re insecure and need to show off what you have in order to look cool.
Picture of yourself topless. This shows insecurity and women think “If he has to show me his chest, he must not be confident in himself!” Some women may message you and say you’re hot, but that’s pretty much it.

The above are things you should avoid if you want better success. Visit your dating site and check out a bunch of profiles. You’ll see what I’m talking about.

© 2007 – David O.

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