I cannot tell you how many times I have heard couples express the fact that they felt their partner should be able to read their mind. Have you ever felt this way? Such thinking can lead to disappointment, sadness, and yes, at times, even anger.

In order to overcome this, we must be much more specific about what our desires and needs are. Part of the problem, I believe, is that we are often afraid that if we really ask for what we desire, we will be rejected. Therefore, it is easier not to ask in the first place and to assume the partner is a “jerk” for not knowing and meeting our needs.

Please talk to one another. Risk saying what you feel and need. Dare to be specific. A case in point. One woman decided to ask her husband for a romantic evening. This was risky for her. What did she get? A box of chocolates and some flowers. What she really wanted was a romantic evening at dinner and then a romantic interlude in the bedroom. Did she tell her partner this? No, she sulked and he was quite confused.

Sometimes we discuss the “rules” but then we change them and forget to tell our partner. We set them up to fail. They can never win.

Is this is happening in your relationship? You can stop it now. Talk to one another. Dare to be specific. Agree to listen and agree to ask for more information if you are not sure of what your partner means. Just as the word romantic has several different connotations, so it is with other words. Please help each other out, and in so doing, you help your relationship to flourish.

Karlynn lives in Tucson, Arizona and owns her own Employee Assistance Program. Originally from California, Karlynn moved to Tucson to pursue a Masters Degree in Rehabilitation Counseling. She is also specialized in addictions. She believes he helping people to help themselves. She enjoys her life with her husband, David, her three daughters, and two adorable grandsons.

What do most of the romantic movies have in common? Yes, a long, passionate kiss that is shared between two star-crossed lovers. You know the type I mean – a romantic lip lock like the one shared by Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh in the 1939 classic, Gone With the Wind. Or how about that sexy upside down kiss between the famous superhero Spiderman and his love Mary Jane? Learning how to kiss a girl may seem easy in the movies, but it can be quite different when you try it for yourself. However, there are some foolproof tips you can follow to guarantee a kiss.

If you want to learn how to kiss a girl, the first thing you need to do is be bold. Women like men who are in charge and who surprise them. Don’t bother with playing the shy gentleman. If you find an attractive girl, initiate a conversation with her and then go for the gusto. She might be caught off guard, but that won’t necessarily mean she didn’t enjoy the surprise element of the whole situation.

If you want to master the art of learning how to kiss a girl, you also need to make sure to retain an air of mystery. Women love mystery and the whole concept of intrigue. You should play up on this fact by teasing her bit. Start by directly asking her for a kiss. Be fully prepared for a flat out no response. At this point, most men would cut their losses. However, a smart man will smile mischievously and say "I’m just making sure you really meant what you said. You looked like you may have meant to say yes so I thought I would check."

You should also build some anticipation when you want to know how to kiss a girl. Start off snuggling on the couch and gently brushing her ear. Things will quickly start to heat up again, at which point you should pull away. Try leaning in and then resisting a few more times. Very soon, she will practically be begging you for a kiss. She will soon decide that she just HAS to have a kiss from you after being teased for a while.

Now, I shouldn’t have to tell you this, but you need to start slowly without forcing your tongue down her throat. There is a time and place for everything, but we are discussing how to kiss a girl, not an illicit a gag response. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with a good French kiss, but only when it is expected. She will find it very disconcerting when you quickly progress from soft, gentle kisses to a full-on "Frencher". You may want to surprise your woman, but not like this.

If you want to know how to kiss a girl properly, just remember the simple rules. Be bold, retain an air of mystery and build up anticipation. Last but not least, remember to start with slow, sensual kisses before revealing any tongue. Have fun and most importantly, be sure to practice often.

Derek Rake is the author of the highly popular The Seducer’s Vault Report, a directory of free ebooks, mp3s and videos on dating and seduction on the Internet. Sign up at TheSeducersVault.com TheSeducersVault.com to receive the report for free.

Love addiction is focused on love as the solution to inner pain,
loneliness and emptiness. In love addiction, the relationship or the need
for romance is all consuming. Nothing else in life has equal
importance.

The Love addict has very intense emotions including anger, fear, hate
and ‘love’ for the other person, and it is this extreme positive or
negative intensity that differentiates love addiction from habits
where we often also develop a craving for the object of desire.

An addiction usually affects and includes the body, emotions and
the mind.

On the physical level, our brain indeed creates a chemical, PEA
that creates the thrill and excitement that we experience when we fall in
love. When this person drops out of our life the body produces
withdrawal symptoms such as shakiness, cramps or loss of appetite.

We all may have experienced such symptoms at the loss of a loved one.
In case of love addiction, there is also a desperate need to regain
this person or relationship back, accompanied by an increasing
sense of guilt or shame about one’s ‘weakness’ to let go of this person.

On an emotional-mental level, being in love makes most people
feel good. In case of love addiction, it creates a feeling of being ‘on top
of the world’, feeling drunken by love, being euphoric beyond any sense
of reality about the steps necessary to turn the attraction into a workable
relationship.

When these feelings fade away, the love addict will do anything to
regain this love even at the price to submerge their own personality into
the loved one by fully identifying with their interests and needs.

In love addiction, the addict is often obsessed with finding the ‘prince
or ‘princess’ that will be THE ONE FOREVER and solve all the
problems. Life without that love seems to be meaningless.

The desperate need for finding that person or regaining a lost love can
destroy all other parts of life, create chaos, tension and anxieties and
threat life itself when chronic grief turns into suicidal thoughts.

Because love addiction gets supported through the ideal of romantic
love in movies and songs, it’s actually quite difficult to crack the self-
delusion that is part of love addiction. All addictions have an element of denial but in case of love addiction it is more severe. Love addicts
often don’t see the connection between their pain and suffering and the
illusionary quality of what they seek as love.

The first step would be to recognise the love addiction as such
and then to take the necessary steps to fulfil all those needs that
have been delegated to THE ONE. This may require finding out
what you can do to be good to yourself, to love yourself and to
appreciate the good things in your life.

Another important step is to accept that you may be single for a long
time.

Start to develop a wide variety of interests and activities, meet
people and make new friends. This will make your company more
pleasant, give you practice in developing social skills, and increase your
chances of finding a compatible partner to cope with everyday life.

With a good network of friends and acquaintances and exploring new
and interesting ways to share your life with them, the emptiness and
painful longing will fade away.

As love addiction is so deeply rooted, you may need extra help in
understanding the dynamics of love addiction and in shifting the
energetic patterns that hold the addiction in place so that you can
develop healthy relationship patterns and communication skills.

I offer a free course in how to develop healthy relationships, a
distance course on love where I shift those energetic patterns
through a broad range of healing modalities such as movement,
breathing, colour or sound and a book and the ebook Beyond
suffering where you will find a comprehensive description of the
different stages of love with its own qualities and challenges to give
you a broader view of the context of love addiction. You will also find a <
b>hands-on manual in this book on how to strengthen a
positive Self and move beyond this illusion of love

Dr. Ulla Sebastian is a well-known author, trainer and psychotherapist.
Her work spans a wide range of themes for professional and personal
growth. Using forty years of research, work with thousands of people
from all over the world and a lifelong experience of self growth and
transformation, she supports people to transform negative life patterns
into an empowered and fulfilled life. Her Ebook: Beyond Suffering at
visioform.com/uk/ebook-joy.htm visioform.com/uk/ebook-joy.htm contains a comprehensive
description and a hands-on manual on how to move towards true love.
Visit her website visioform.com visioform.com for free courses, distance
courses, books, ebooks and articles.

Online dating can be very entertaining and gratifying.

Since its inception, online dating had continuously brought two people together in spite of the fact that they are worlds apart, with lands and waters separating them. Online dating made bridges to connect people together, enjoy each other, and build dreams together.

However, there are instances wherein people do not just connect to an online dating site and instantly find somebody whom they can share the rest of their lives with.

Online dating is a continuous, systematic process. It entails careful selection of words, pictures, and representations of the person involved in order to get the best results. Moreover, from the time they get to find somebody they think they are compatible with, the process continues as they get to know each other through a series of messages, chats, and other forms of communication.

Along with this comes the careful selection of words used and messages conveyed in order to establish natural, free-flowing, yet enlightening conversations. These are not just mere exchange of words and phrases but more on the verge of getting to know each other.

Hence, it is extremely important to know which questions to ask so that the person can get a better sense of who the other person is on the other side of the virtual screen.

Here are some of the questions that one should ask to his or her online dating e-friend in order to assess the personality and the attitude of the other person. These questions are specifically inclined to provide the necessary information regarding an individual’s personal conviction on certain matters and his or her own preferences on things.

Those who are involved in online dating just have to keep in mind that when asking these questions, they should make it appear very natural so that they will not sound like they are being confrontational.

In addition, those who will ask these questions should be sure that they are also prepared to answer the same.

1. What is the major error that people make when online dating for the first time?

This question will illustrate some idea about how the other person views the opposite sex. In this way, one could get an insight on the attitude of the other person and his or her personal beliefs on some important matters like dating and relationships.

2. What are you looking for in a guy/girl?

With this question, an individual can get hold of the qualities that the other person is looking for in a companion.

However, one should take note of how the other person tries to answer the question. If in the event that he or she replies with the usual “sense of humor,” chances are, the other person has not yet thought about the answer.

3. What is a really successful relationship?

One could get a good view on how the other person values relationship. It would be better to hear the other person provide an answer regarding how the two persons who are involved in the relationship should work together as they grow and have a better sense of personality.

4. What is your view on online dating services?

Through this question, a person will be able to know if the other person had some serious negative experience concerning online dating or the other way around. In addition, through the answers of the other person, one could guess if he or she is still willing to consider online dating or not.

5. Did you fail on your last relationship?

Most people would certainly blame the other person in the relationship. Others blame their selves too much. It would be better to hear some answers like they (the couple) equally share the blame and that it is just time to part ways.

The point in asking these questions is to establish a solid foundation on the kind of personality and attitude the other person has. It is when keeping the communication line open that matters most.

The problem with a lot of people involved in online dating is that most of them do not have any idea how to carry the conversation and how to keep the lines burning. They do not know what questions to ask and how to assess the answers that they get.

Boiled down, asking some reliable questions will give the person an edge over a lot of things. Hence, he or she will be able to assert that when the time comes that they have to meet personally, the concerned person will be ready to face his or her online date.

About The Author:

Lawrence Andrews is an ePublisher, software developer, consultant,
and author of numerous books. Visit his Private Label Content and
Software site at lmamedia.com lmamedia.com for more information about
Dating Do’s and Dont’s.

You may use this article freely on your website as long as this resource
box is included, a link point back to my site, and this article remains
unchanged! Copyright 2005 Lawrence Andrews