Our lives are so busy that work and family responsibilities preclude very much quiet time with our mates. We are so weary when we finally fall into bed that we seldom take the time to really talk to each other or to nurture that specialness that is ours alone.

Look at your schedule and see where some quiet time together can be stolen from the world. If you needed to arrange an important meeting, you would make time. If you had a child in the hospital, you would most certainly make the time to spend hours there.

The time required doesn’t have to be huge. The commitment to make that time does. This is the most important person in your life, not someone to be relegated to a list, somewhere below a business requirement and the PTA.

Snatch an hour here and an hour there just to be alone with your love, nurturing the uniqueness of the two of you. Take the kids to their grandparents or get a babysitter. Turn off your blackberry and your cell phone.

You can use your uninterrupted time to do anything you enjoy. Take a walk, or a drive, and talk about yourselves. Play word games or trivia on the Internet, laughing and communicating with each other as you did when you were dating so long ago. Listen to music that was popular when you met and reminisce about the good old days.

Talk about movies you’ve seen, books you’ve read, sports, politics, or national events. Talk about plans for the future and how you see your lives together in a year, five years, ten. Talk about your problems and what you can do together to resolve them.

Plan when your next time together will be and what you are going to do. And do it.

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Missy never wanted to discuss marriage. So, one day I decided that it was
time to plan a proposal. She was very fond of the Victorian period. Therefore, I
began collecting the items necessary to make the proposal.

First, I found a picture of a Victorian engagement ring in the Smithsonian
magazine. I took the picture to a local jeweler and had him make a similar one.
The ring was a large garnet surrounded by pearls. The shaft of the ring was in a
gold filigree pattern. Next, I purchased an old steamer trunk from a junk/antique
store. I spent several days rebuilding and refinishing the trunk. I then purchased
a silver heart shaped box to put the ring in. I placed the box with the ring in the
trunk. I also placed an old doll, a bible, and other artifacts that would have been
found in a young ladies trunk.

Finally, I covered the items with three handmade quilts. The top one was a
double wedding ring quilt the second was a young girls bonnet quilt and the third
was a young boys Stars and stripes quilt. These quilts were to represent my
desire to marry and eventually have a family with her.

Earlier in the week, I invited my girlfriend over for a home cooked dinner.
Her birthday is in December and she always complained about losing out to
Christmas. So, I told her that we were going to celebrate her birthday in July. She
laughed, but was excited about the idea of receiving a gift. She arrived and I had
a candle light dinner prepared. The trunk was tucked away in a corner covered
by a white tablecloth. After dinner, I directed her to the steamer trunk and told her
that her present was under the tablecloth. She removed the cloth and was
excited to see that I had bought her a steamer trunk. At first, she paused and I
instructed her to open the trunk. She opened the trunk and began removing
items. As she removed the third quilt and began looking at the other contents,
she pulled out the silver heart shaped box.

As she held the box, I went to my knees and told her that I was presenting
her with this “Hope Chest” as a memory of where she had come from and a hope
of where we would be going together. The moment she opened the ring box, I
asked her to be my wife. She began to cry. She did not say a word. It seemed as
though an hour had passed when she looked up and through her tears, shook
her head “Yes.” There we sat hugging and kissing. Missy and I have been
married for seven years and we now have a beautiful daughter named Emma
who sleeps under a handmade bonnet quilt.

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The chemistry between a man and woman can be either good chemistry or bad chemistry. Many of us, through lots of experience know what it feels like to be in a relationship where the chemistry can be very strong, but it is destructive on an individuals level and as a couple. Relationships founded on this chemistry are often riddled with pain, guilt, fear and any number of thoughts and feelings that are energy depleting and can quickly spiral to obsessions and depression.

What about good chemistry, what does it feel and look like, and how do you know the chemistry between the two of you is good? How do you know you are with the right person?

1. You feel very comfortable with one another, as if you have known each other longer than you actually have.

2. You tend to agree with one another on most issues, and there is a feeling of warm familiarity surrounding your personal belief systems, values, philosophies and life goals.

3. You instinctively consider each other as equals and no one person does more sacrificing to be with the other.

4. You are very much involved in one another’s daily affairs and conversations between the two of you are generally mentally stimulating and lively.

5. You joke around with each other a lot, and your relationship is spontaneous and light, adding a happy and friendly boost to your interactions.

6. You nurture each other with specialized attention, mutual appreciation, acceptance, admiration and playfulness; these keep the romance alive.

7. You enjoy spending plenty of quite time together in homely surroundings giving true meaning to the words feeling “at home” with one another.

8. Open communication is alive and thriving, making it possible to be yourselves with one another.

9. There is a shared feeling of growth and support of one another and both of you give each other room to grow as a self-directed independent individual.

10. You are more able than most couples to remain objective about your relationship and to work through problems that most couples find very difficult to deal with.

11. You are warm, gracious, compassionate and flexible with one another, and tend to expect the best from one another.

12. You easily forgive each other when things go wrong and trusting one another keeps you closer.

13. You are quite protective (not possessive or controlling) of one another and of the privacy of your romantic lives. Others see you as a positively bonded and caring couple.

14. There is no fear of losing the other and commitment to each other and dedication to your relationship are important for your sense of security as a couple.

15. There is an earthy sensuality to your relationship and the sexual chemistry between you is so apparent it’s almost tangible.

16. Expressing yourselves emotionally and sexually comes naturally and without inhibitions. Feeling secure with one another puts you in the “mood” for intimacy and strengthens your affections for one another.

17. Together you are able to take big risks knowing that you will always have reach other and can always count on each other.

18. There is a whole lot of positive energy generated between the two of you, and together, you are enthusiastic about life itself.

19. The longer you’re with each other, the stronger your relationship becomes.

20. The relationship is so life-changing that you know without a doubt in your heart that if it were to end, you will take something from it. You feel that you are somehow a different and better person.

Hopefully this information will put your heart and mind to rest. But if it causes you to feel “uneasy” then you need to really look at who you are with. You can be honest with yourself and face the pain that comes with the realization that you may not be with the right person for you, or you can ignore it now and later regret why knowing what you know you still pursued a relationship that was not good for you. The beauty of all this is that you have the power over what you choose to do!

About the Author: Christine Akiteng is an internationally renowned Sexual Confidence/Dating Coach and author of eBook: The Art Of Seducing Out Of Fullness™. Her unique approach to dating has helped hundreds create positive, constructive, honest and fulfilling relationships.

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Wedding band purchases are ones which should be made after some diligent shopping and thoughtful consideration. After all, the sentimental meaning behind such a purchase as well as the lasting characteristic associated with buying wedding bands is one which deserves some serious thought. There are a few factors which the engaged couple should consider prior to buying their wedding bands for the big day.

Style of Wedding Bands

These days one is able to find wedding bands in a variety of styles. This relates not only to the type of metal which the band is comprised of but the detailing on the ring as well. As for the metal composition of the wedding band, one can choose from yellow gold, white gold, platinum and titanium, to name a few. The style of the ring as it refers to detailing can range anywhere from a plain gold band to an ornate, inscribed ring. The couple should decide which type of ring is best for them as doing so will narrow down the search for the perfect set of rings.

Similar Rings or Unique Bands for the Bride and Groom

Couples who are about to walk down the aisle also have another option when it comes to the rings. Certain jewelry producers will offer similar style rings for bride and groom and this is a nice option to consider. Choosing wedding bands which match one another is a wonderful added touch with regard to the rings. However, if the engaged couple decides that they would both like different styles of rings and are fine with not having matching wedding bands, purchasing these types of rings is fine also. There really are no set rules when it comes to wedding bands as it is the future married couple which needs to be pleased with their ring selection.

Monetary Considerations

Those who are about to embark on the wedding band shopping trip should consult their bank account to determine how much they are able to spend on their rings. Since most couples will have to put money aside for other wedding expenses, it is a good idea to know how much money is allotted for wedding bands and limit one’s search to that price range in order to find the perfect rings.

Where to Buy the Rings

Lastly, the couple should decide where they are going to purchase their wedding bands. Many jewelry stores, both large and small, sell these pieces of jewelry and have a wide selection of such items in stock. By visiting a physical store location the couple will be able to browse the selection, try on rings and purchase rings which are the perfect size. However, if one likes to buy most of their items online, knows their ring size and is fine purchasing wedding bands in this manner, then considering a purchase of wedding bands through an online retailer works as well.

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